In India, we have a notion of “You Complete me”, in almost all of the Bollywood movies, it is evident and since the day we gain consciousness, we start searching for our soul mate who can complete us.
Well, this notion is a trap which would eventually lead us to become unhappy, I know, I am going out of the line here and a very few of you would understand what I am saying, please bear with me and read along.
This notion gives us a feeling that we are incomplete by default, which is so not true and it creates a room for unhappiness in our mind, The very fact of incompleteness is sad and we should stay away from this feeling. Feeling incomplete would make us feel broken and then we would desperately need someone to complete us, and such story is not conducive for being happy.
Consider this analogy, Water is much more important than gold or diamond and yet water is almost inexpensive as compared to gold and diamond because it is easily available, when you are needy, you are easily available and others won’t pay attention to you.
When you are needy you are basically willing to do anything and everything for someone else and they start taking you for granted. Being needy makes you less respected by others and you lose respect for yourself.
We don’t need anybody else to complete us, God have not created us incomplete, it’s just a Bollywood Masala which has made us believe that we are incomplete, and we should try not to fall into that trap.
Thank you Mridul to suggesting me to write on relationships.
Everyone has come across a person who has many luxuries in their lives and we watch them fighting over petty issues. I know I have, because I was one of those person who had everything and was not realizing it for a very long time.
I have seen many people who have never faced failure and it is only after the encounter of failure, we gain consciousness of the successes we had in the past and also it makes us feel more grateful towards life. Gaining consciousness is one of the best things that can happen to anybody.
For me it was very important to fail at something, because I never had seen failure in my life before and people who have seen only successes have difficulty in cherishing it for a longer time and they tend to think it was meant to be that way. We tend to believe that the successes we had in the past was because of our own effort, and this gave us a sense of hubristic pride which did not last long enough.
We are successful because of the people around us . It was the life situation around us which made us victorious in the past and we have to keep that in mind and we should express gratitude towards all the people who supported us during that time, because it is only because of them we are successful now.
Many times we are very harsh on ourselves. Often, we do not forgive ourselves for the mistakes that we have done in the past, be it a failure in a relationship or in a business.
We are our own critic, we use to criticize ourselves for all the things that didn’t work out in the past. We know our strengths and weaknesses, it is only after acknowledging all the imperfections in ourselves, and forgiving ourselves for not being perfect, we can grow further.
Professor Raj of ISB Hydrabad has said many times in his one of the courses in Coursera, that I like the most is “Life is perfect with it’s imperfections“.
It is only after forgiving ourselves, we can progress towards real growth.
Hope you find some value from it.